Anyone who has lived overseas has most likely encountered a “honeymoon stage” and a “disenchantment stage”, among other stages. We will take a look at the various natural occurring stages one may encounter after moving here. By understanding some of the stages, one can begin to grasp their own situation and emotional or mental well-being.

1) Anxiety; “what have I gotten myself into?”
After first arriving in Japan excitement and tension carries one for awhile until a few months into a person’s stay one reaches a point where he/she wonders just exactly “what have I gotten myself into?”.

2) Anger; “it wasn’t supposed to be like this”
In the case of a person planning to stay long-term, oftentimes he/she will start to regret his/her decision (of coming to Japan, getting married, taking on a job, long-term study program, etc.). At this time one has started to adjust to his/her environment and has begun to grasp some of the differences and discrepancies, etc. As such anger builds as reality differs from one’s former idea of what life here would be like.

3) Exhaustion; becoming tired from adjustment and others expectations
After trying to adjust to one’s new environment, culture, language and customs a person will find that they have used up so much energy that they are mentally exhausted. Working to maintain relationships (social and private) while living in a foreign country also can be the source of various stresses and exhaustion. In many cases, foreign residents work very hard to model themselves after the native people of the country they live in (in this case, the Japanese). This can also lead to exhaustion, unexpected identity issues and other stresses.

4) Homesickness
After the newness wears off, one has begun to adjust and adapt to his/her new environment. At this time one may begin to compare his/her home country and Japan (or the country he/she is living in). As such, one may find things he/she does not like about Japan and may begin to become frustrated with Japanese people/society. At this stage it may be a good idea to go back to one’s home country for an extended visit.
If a person does not return to his/her home country at this stage, one may encounter deep misgivings about their choice of staying in Japan. Or, they may find that they go from one extreme to another and go to great lengths to adapt to various aspects of the Japanese language, culture and society.

5) Identity
As mentioned above, at some point a person may have deep misgivings about their choice of staying in Japan. At this point quite a bit of time may have passed and the people around the foreign resident (be they family, co-workers, friends, Japanese, etc.) may not be so readily able to understand his/ her anxiety or misgivings. As such, a person may start to internalize their feelings causing great distress which can sometimes lead to sudden disappearance from home/ work, or in worst case scenarios suicide.

6) Stress from cultural, religious and language differences
Needless to say cultural, religious and language differences can lead to stress. Not being able to understand the local customs/culture, having different religious beliefs or encountering language barriers is extremely frustrating. In the case a person lives in or near urban areas he/she has greater access to churches, organizations, information in one’s native tongue, various events and stores. This greatly helps to alleviate stress. But for people living far away from urban centers or lack being able to speak in or receive information in their native tongue can naturally lead to stress and feelings of isolation. Additionally, being able to call home and talk to family or friends can be a financial difficulty for some foreign residents. When such factors or stress build up too much a person may start to act differently. In this case, getting immediate help is highly advisable.

7) Japanese language and adaptation
If a person learns the language of the foreign country he/she is living in, in this case Japanese, he/she can begin to grasp the customs, culture, nuances and character of the people and country. This can greatly help one adapt and understand one’s surroundings plus greatly improve the quality of one’s life. Also by recognizing the various stages one may encounter can help a person recognize the source of his/her anger, frustration, anxiety, etc. And knowing that these feelings or stages can occur throughout one’s stay can help a person deal with various stresses and challenges that come up. Having trusting friends or co-workers to talk with can greatly help one, however at certain times a neutral individual (counselor/ doctor) can also be of further assistance.